I Don’t Want a Stupid Title

1) I am the sole owner of a sound mop and a thickly bristled broom.

2) That horrible feeling one has when he/she has the stomach flu is merely a memory to me (so long as this stabbing pain in my lower back isn’t the onslaught of a vicious kidney stone ripping its way through my urethra). 

3) I have a warm lap filled with a sleeping puppy who is incapable of making neither mess nor sound.

4) I am 194/200 months finished with an otherwise pointless education.

5) The fact that the supposed existence of a state of non-existence seems quite promising.

6) The sinking feeling that the opposite also seems quite promising.

7) Knowing, and without trying to get a big head about it, that I photograph marginally well somewhere around 35%f the time (check out that acceptable looking lass to the left).

Knowing that I’ll most likely never be fat, and according to what most women supposedly think, I therefore have no real problems, and besides, lots of men other than Popeye might find that plank-like “Olive Oyl” look sexy.

9) I feel better when I feel bad.  To me, it feels like a home that’s not in the blustery nether-regions of the economic-wasteland that is upstate New York.  I take comfort in crap.

10) There’s no shortage of crap in the world. 

I guess things are looking up for our hero. 

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“Life’s a big stupid crap fest.”